Background information: Jean was performing at
IMM today, Strings concert. Sadly, her supporters were out for lunch together. After lunch,
yeye gave me a lift to church since he had to go for elders' meeting anyway. Dad also had to go, but he and mom went to pick Jean up first. The rest of the text relates to what
happened on the long yet meaningful journey.
It started off with a simple question from me. I asked
yeye what the church was going to do about hiring a full time music pastor since we were currently short of one. It then led to me asking him a carload of questions about issues that had been going through my mind recently.
I've been growing up in this church for 16 years, and I've not been exposed to any other church except one in US for 3 years, but it was about the same. In a Chinese church which isn't even the Chinese assembly of another "big" church, an average of slightly over 200 people is the norm for services. And unlike large churches, there's only enough people for one service a week. If the offering amount (something I've always liked to analyse every Sunday) reaches $4000 in total, it's highly rare and something wonderful must have happened to a pocket. On a closer level, I've envied other youth groups before. Compared to other English assembly youth fellowships who have a long list of cell groups, 3 is the number in my fellowship (15-19 years old). I'm talking about each group = 6 people. For worship, thankfully, we have the luxury of pianists. Violins and guitar (or band) are comparatively rarely used. There are other churches out there which have a band at their service, or even better, an orchestra.
I know whatever I've been stating up there is rather materialistic, and it isn't of crucial importance to my faith. But after being in this environment for some time, I just got curious as I began to open my eyes to the world outside, and started to notice various problems my church faces.
After asking
yeye about the potential music pastor, we talked about incomes of some people who worked in the church. Going by the offering amount collected each week, I knew that they couldn't have been paid much. And trust me, it's not much. Considering they have gotten their masters or other degrees in theology, anyone would have expected them to earn a good sum like most parents I know do. But no.
Yeye had to remind me that though it wasn't much, they were doing it for God. It was a timely reminder during bible study today - invest in heaven's stock market.
I remember I asked him bluntly if our church was rich. I was hoping that maybe it was, the way I saw it when I was younger and still living in my well. But of course, facts are facts. Suddenly, I didn't want a music pastor anymore. Though it would benefit the choir and other music ministries, it went more to a "better quality of life". I wanted the church to save money and not fret over the building fund. Maybe I could help do the music side next time, but I wouldn't want to be paid.
I asked
yeye about people leaving the church, and new people coming in over the years. Some people left due to various reasons, and new people entered, not just non-believers. I thought it was very
un-Christian for people to leave their church and serve in our church because of certain disagreements over issues there. After all, I had been instilled with the "don't bother church hopping if you face problems in you own church, because problems exist everywhere" way of thought for as long as I can remember. I later learnt that we had to respect their decisions and accept them as part of our church, the same goes to those who decided to leave. It isn't for us to judge them.
We also talked about the future of our church. I was concerned about the ageing population we had. People my age would rather be in a church with a large youth group, advanced facilities and maybe some fame. I've envied such churches before. I was also slightly frustrated that I could see numerous problems with a small church like ours, but not with others. But
yeye managed to give me a bigger picture. Every developed country is starting to age, and Singapore is one of them. There's no doubt it will hit churches. The only difference is the magnitude of the impact. He also reminded me that no church is perfect. There will always be problems when there are humans. For example, disagreements over certain ideas and beliefs. There have been problems since 20 A.D. (Paul's time), hence the letters we see in the bible, and there still are today. It's not about the problems, but more about how the church tackles them and continues growing.
Things that affect one's faith are more crucial than the issues I've been thinking about. I know the church will never be some perfect place I once thought it was, but it won't change where I'll head to every Sunday morning. It's where my roots are. Though I'm less blind to the imperfections of my church, I'll still stay on to face the challenges. Where there are challenges, there are also successes. Like for a small community church, you get to reach out to people living in 1-room flats nearby, and people who converse in dialect and Chinese.
While on the ageing population bit, we digressed to
yeye's age and people living longer lives. It's a little out of point in this topic, but anyway. He's considered still "young", but he used "
if I live to 90, you can...", which scared me a bit. I must write the biographies of my grandparents after O levels so that I can learn more from their experiences.
The journey to church ended here.